Thursday, March 10, 2005

Nostalgic procrastination

I finally found a reason for my procrastination. I have this project to work on and I keep extending my deadline claiming (to myself and no one else) that it’s a bigger project than I expected and it needs more time. My initial deadline (March 1st) was extended to March 15. Now that the 15th is approaching, I extend once again to the end of March. But instead of blaming it on laziness or pure procrastination (Ellen has a cute little clip on that in her standup “here and now”), I finally found (or invented) the reasons behind my multiple extensions. I am homesick. Purely and utterly homesick.

I miss my friends. I miss my family. I miss my students. I miss my office. I miss my house. I miss my walks with my sisters on the beach (dwindling as they were becoming). I miss trying out new restaurants with my friends and family (and oh that is a never-ending pastime in Kuwait). I miss having breakfast at my mom’s on Saturdays with my brother off from his bank job (and more often than not, my other brothers and sisters also off, by choice). I miss shocking my students with my choice of controversial articles. I miss playing with my nephews and nieces. I miss hanging out at my friend’s house watching Sex and the City and feasting on Pizza, sushi, doughnuts and ice-cream. I miss my book club. I miss having people at my house. I miss complaining about not having a good enough beach to enjoy in summer. I miss end of semester lunches with my students. I miss going for late night gaz shawarma with my friends. I miss teaching in the outdoors. I miss my grandma. I miss my sisters. I miss my sisters a lot. I miss Chocolate Bar and I miss Le Notre. I miss meeting my friends at Johnny Rockets (it's not the food, it's the company;) Yes. Believe it or not. I miss Kuwait.

So here now. I am not procrastinating. I am not lazy. I am not lost. I am not tired. I am not putting things off. I simply am homesick, an emotional state of depravity that prevents me from working. Quite ironic when you come to think of it since the main reason I am away from home is to work on this and other projects.

4 comments:

Jelly Belly said...

Honey I could totally relate...I have been home sick for the past 3 years..yes I haven't been home for that long...and my reason is I don't wanna go unless I'm done with school...hang in there...I know how hard it is...some days are better than others...I know you don't need any advice from anyone..but try to focus and work on your project...good luck dear :)

Shurouq said...

Miss you too walla..
We're having grilled nagroors for lunch.. :)
The whole gang is here
My AC isn't working :/
I think I will sleep in Mom's extra room tonight

Cousins are meeting up in Chocolate Bar sometime next week ;) 7arra

Yalla bye.. 6a7 elghada

Jewaira said...

Sometimes it's good to be away so that you can appreciate what is taken for granted. Renewal.
Wish you luck on your project. You're lucky to be able to devote time to that.

Hanan said...

I'm new to blogworld and my replies on past posts might be outdated at times.

jelly belly. thanks. 3 years. wow. i should be thankful then. i'll be home in a couple of months hopefully.

shurouq. chocolate bar is in my thoughts constantly. so are you and the cousins of course ;)

jewaira. thanks for your support. and welcome to my blog.